I feel mean about the words that I wrote last night

while I feel like they do bear truth

We still had a great time when we’d hang out

I think I get asshurt and do mean shit

say hurtfull shit

ive been more mean to Danny than any other newer friends of mine

i think because i was so comfortable around him

but I think that’s why I was so scared to trust him

he never gained my confidence in him

man I ripped my silk pjs last night

anyways I guess I just need to clarify

he’s not stupid I think I kept saying shit about his intellect what I meant by that is I think he’s easily influenced to the point where you don’t know what his true feelings are about shit; part of the deceit

things just never added up

words didn’t equate action

or maybe the words were part of the act of manipulation

i just always felt like he was trying to manipulate my feelings and I always questioned if he was talking shit about me behind my back

if I feel that way about you

then that already tells me the answer

I’ve had people who I’ve known for years and they’ve fucked me over like I was nothing like our friendship meant nothing

I was something that could be done away with

who knows maybe I lost a good friend because I let my situations and insecurities about other people cloud my judgement about him

i don’t think that what I wrote yesterday was just about him though in that moment I was mad because I was second guessing my actions I kept thinking

was I too rash in my decision to remove all those people

what if I’m just being an asshole

do I just want their attention

i think I was just making a move to try to do something positive for myself but I shouldn’t hurt people’s feelings if I really am trying to cleanse myself

rip my friendships wt y’all thanks for the good times

im moving on

I did my time missing you now you’ll just be remembered