Maybe to have good friends you need to be a good friend  

I think I’m just tired of the disappointment of feeling like a good friend and expecting similar reciprocity. My mistake lies in my expectations. I know that. It doesn’t make it hurt any less. I just need to be a good friend to myself before I worry about being anybody else’s friend because I know people sure as hell ain’t worried about me.  

Life has been quiet lately in a mostly neutral way. Not good; not bad, just quiet. Sometimes it’s calming, sometimes it’s lonely. I’m adjusting, growing, loving, missing, grieving. The void will never be filled. I’ll always miss him. It’s just kind of hard to be here without him. He was the best friend I’ve ever had. I’ve never had a friend like him and I never will. Pure love, adoration and appreciation for one another without questions, expectations; just love. Yesterday was so windy and it reminded me of the night before he passed. Man I miss you. I miss you. I think that’s why I don’t even want to be around anyone because nadien nunca va llegar a tu nivel ni te avalorines lines