It's not dated but I'm pretty sure it's written between 2015-2016

"I hate that I'm that girl too. The one who thinks they can change you. You are who you are and that's why I like you; but it's also why I wish I didn't. You're selfish most often and can be cruel, but it's the times when you're sweet and funny that gives me all these butterflies. I wish I didn't anticipate your arrival as much as I do but when I see you it's like my inner-sky goes from gray to blue. I'm smitten, and it makes me sick. I don't want to care about you as much as I do. It scares me to think that all those times people told me once you find that someone, all those things you were picky about fade away bc they don't matter anymore, you're the only one that does. The more I deny it the stronger it grows. I think you're scared too. That's why you act that way. Even though this is how I feel, these words I'll never say. No one I've ever really liked, has liked me back, but up until now I've never wanted to share my life w/someone this much but I've been so scared to have my heart crushed. I'm sad I can't believe a word you say because you're such a fucking charmer. Fuck you for making me like you. Fuck you for making me feel like I need someone other than myself. Fuck you for making me want to fuck you. I just need time and I can get over you. I just wish you'd stop being so unique and whatever the fuck else it is that I like about you. I think you're scared that you like me/want me too much. I've seen it in your eyes. I hate that I'm scared to write about this. The reasons to not like you highly outweigh the reasons why I do but it doesn't change anything. But really though, fuck you. Fuck you for making me like you when you knew you weren't going to reciprocate. Fuck you for the flirting, fuck you for the compliments, fuck you for making me jealous. Fuck you for making me cry and fuck you for making me have all this shit bottled up inside. I remember when I first started working there I thought you were an asshole and an idiot.